Telefon Tel Aviv, coming soon to a smallish venue near you

Telefon Tel Aviv is half the band it used to be: Charles Cooper died in January in Chicago at age 31, with media reports suggesting he may have committed suicide. TTA's surviving member, Joshua Eustis, has remained mum on the circumstances surrounding his bandmate's death. In any event, Eustis recently tapped a longtime friend and collaborator to join him on tour this summer. Telefon's playing a number of September shows in DCQ territory -- find a way to get there (dates below). And if you still don't have Immolate Yourself, cop it stat or follow the album's instructions.

Sept. 11th: Bell House, BK

Sept. 12th: Mercury Lounge, Manhattan

Sept. 25th: Spaceland, LA

Sept. 26th: Bottom of the Hill, SFC

Opportunistic Lefties Strike Again

Nice, gay marriage proponents: Stealing the concept of nonconventional marriage support from Ben & Jerry's. How very Obama of you. You liberals are shameless. Shameless, I say. 

Who's up for a taste?

Mindblowing Hip-Hop Guest Spot of the Year:

Little late on this, but eh. Reckunize? Another brother whose inebriated persona made him a star. And no, Eminem is not the guest. If you're still at a loss, consider that mystery doc's pals are trying to get their crossover on too, with mixed results.

Dude's back with Relapse, by the way, if ya ain't heard it (even though the resurgence of the psycho homophobe comes off as stale on a couple tracks). It doesn't hurt that he channels the cadence of DCQ OG faves The Pharcyde and Brotha Lynch Hung on "3 a.m." and "Stay Wide Awake," respectively.

"...the 1970 Chevrolet Nova is a lot better automobile than O.J. Simpson."

Apologies for going AWOL. Excuses abound: "Work deadline" is one. "Not writing anything" is another. "Early-onset delirium tremens" is better still. Let's just say I'm missing a shoe.

To recap: I still have a job, the Giants are satisfactorily inconsistent, and the Niners picked up a guy who could prove to be the second coming of John Taylor but is just as likely to channel fellow 10-pick J.J. Stokes. Also, John Starks has nothing better to do this Sunday than to ref some dbag kickball league in Brooklyn.

And since we've come this far, let's just charge the post to sports and toss in a vintage ad that would be funnier if both Potrero's Finest and Detroit's Worst weren't so utterly fucked at present:

Pair with Jameson, Jack, Patron or Schlitz

If there's better drinking music out there, do inform.